A few years ago I bought my dad the book "Sh*t My Dad Says" for fathers day. That spring he took it with him to Chicago when he went to see family. Once there it got read by him and my grandpa. And as he was leaving my Uncle wanted to read it. The book has remained in Chicago ever since.
Now I spent the new years in Chicago and found the book. I read it in about a day, and I have to say IT IS AWESOME! (I would prefer to say amazing, but apparently the American public has said that word too much, and some feel it should be stricken from the dictionary.)
Here are some of my favorite quotes: (Warning...most of these quotes will have swearing in them!)
ON ACCIDENTS: "I don't give a shit how it happened, the window is broken... Wait, why is there syrup everywhere? Okay, you know what? Now I give a shit how it happened. Let's hear it!"
ON SPORTSMANSHIP: "You pitched a great game, you really did. I'm proud of you. Unfortunately, your team is shitty... No, you can't go getting mad at people because they're shitty. Life will get mad at them, don't worry."
ON HIS FIRST SCHOOL DANCE: " Are you wearing perfume?... Son there ain't any cologne in this house, only your mother's perfume. I know that scent, and let me tell you, it's disturbing to smell your wife on your thirteen-year-old son."
ON RECEIVING STRAIGHT A'S ON HIS REPORT CARD: "Hot Damn! You're a smart kid - I don't care what people say about you!... I'm kidding, nobody says you're not smart. They say other stuff, but not that."
ON TRYING OUT FOR THE HIGH SCHOOL FRESHMAN FOOTBALL TEAM: "I ain't letting you try out, you're too skinny... No, I hate to break it to you, but you can't do whatever you want, and you most certainly are not a man."
There are way more quotes to share, but those are just a few of my favorites... and the ones with the least amount of swear words. =)
PS I know this book came out years ago, but I still felt the need to share its awesomeness.
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